I have been doing a lot of thinking, and a lot of reading lately. Here is the conclusion I have finally come to: I'm not perfect and I don't have to be perfect. It feels great to say that. I always felt like I had to live up to this expectation of what I thought the perfect woman should be like. Guess what? She doesn't exist. No one is perfect. I like my imperfect life and my imperfect body and my imperfect self just the way I am.
I used to base my self-esteem on my relationships. As in, if I was in one and it was going well, I felt good about myself. It was so wrong to do that because it is way too much pressure on the person I was in the relationship with. Basically, my happiness should not depend on another person.
The way I view relationships now is much healthier. I look at life like it is a bowl of vanilla soft serve with rainbow sprinkles. Would a little hot fudge taste good on the ice cream? Hell yeah. However, does the ice cream taste just fine without the hot fudge? You bet. That's the way relationships are to me now. Would it be nice to have a man to share my life with? Absolutely, but I'm not going to stop eating my bowl of ice cream because there is not hot fudge on it.
I can't lie, it would be nice to have someone to come home to--and here's a confession--for all my blathering about being an independent woman and taking care of myself, I really am very traditional at heart. I would absolutely not mind being a stay at home mother and doing the cooking and cleaning and taking care of a household. I know, I know, I know. But, in my defense, I can still change a car battery, shoot a gun and lift heavy boxes of books, all while wearing
high heels.
No comments:
Post a Comment