My brother taught me how to read when I was four. My mom didn't even know I knew how to read until I walked into the kitchen with the mail and read off her letter from Ed McMahon "You may already be a winner." Ever since then, I have always loved books.

My mom is always after me to write a book but I really can't even think what I would write about that people would want to read. The most interesting thing about me is my family. Seriously. Below are two conversations I had with them recently that really does make me think about writing a humorous memoir. If Laurie Notaro and Chelsea Handler can do it, I know I can.


And P.S. I really don't make this stuff up. It happened just as I have recorded it here.

Conversation #1 (and please let me add I have two separate Facebook accounts...one is personal and the other is professional)
Dad: I joined Facebook.
Me: Oh really? That's great. Don't friend me.
Dad: I already looked you up. Why are all of your friends either Jewish or rabbis? And some of them rabbis were even women!

Conversation #2
Mom: Your father went to dinner with some of his coworkers the other night when he was in Massachusetts.
Me: Oh that's nice. I'm sure he had fun.
Mom: Yeah, they went to some sports bar.
Me (knowing his coworkers are all in their 20's and 30's): What was the name of the "sports bar?"
Mom: I think he said it was called Hooters.
Me (trying to hold back my laughter and failing miserably): Dad went to Hooters?!?!
Mom: Yes, why?
Me: That's not a sports bar! It's where women wear these tiny little outfits so the men can ogle them.
Mom: Well, your father is a middle aged truck driver. I'm not too worried about it.

I really think I need to start bringing a tape recorder with me when I go to their house so I can capture every hysterical conversation that takes place. Then there is always the classic "NATO can kiss my ass" when Dad had too much wine at Thanksgiving. I love my family.